VII

We invented language to make the mechanical world meaningful - to justify the repetition of things. To 'order' it so things could be predicted with a fair degree of certainty.

But the certainty in all things is superficial. Nothing is repeated, nothing is mechanical. We are only trying to fit everything in the realms of language. It is not right to fit the limitless within limits. Limits superimposed on the limitless never justify the details.

The problem with language is when it also limits and mechanizes thought patterns. Truly considered, thought is just as arbitrary as nature- a day at work is all it takes for an 'escape' thought to creep in. Balance is also a word that limits natural behavior. We just might not know what is good for us and what is not good. We can be random or we can be conditioned. There is no problem with conditioning; it is when aberrations take place in this conditioning when we realize the 'real' randomness of life.

A conditioned life with perfect knowledge of randomness is what we then live in- as a second stage. We learn to 'laugh' at conditioned life and appreciate the proofs of randomness.

The third stage is when we realize how the limitations imposed on us do not guarantee the individual good. It is only meant to maintain sanity. But our true nature is insanity, we are born in a random world, and we are fettered by chains of conditioned arising.

Stage 4 is a realization that freedom does not exist and the chains are our only escape from the random world; and so we continue our life in quiet desperation. We use the limited randomness we have to fulfill our real nature, but like the chained elephant of the circus, we can neither run away (hopeless dependence on the system) nor perform our duties (dependence on our inner nature)

Stage 5 makes us seek what we cannot have - immortality. We seek permanence in transitory life- we want desperately to go beyond human form. We find permanence in death; and we are scared to suddenly find ourselves helplessly thrown into the unknown permanence of life which is death.

Death of the conditioning and freedom from randomness by being aware that there is no freedom from existence; stage 6 searches for something beyond thought. It wants to BE rather than Exist; FEEL rather than think. It wants to listen with the eyes and smell with the ears; see with the skin and 'live' in all possible ways before it’s too late.

Stage 7 is not even seeking permanence; it is not seeking transience; it does not want a bound existence; a freedom characterized by choices-Stage 7 realizes freedom excludes choice and includes 'phenomenal awareness'. He knows there is no such thing.

Stage 8 wants unsuccessfully to believe in a hope- a hope that there truly is an escape; and escape that will finally put his curiosity and continual questioning on the bearing and purpose of his existence to rest. It will give him his randomness back; it will make him more vibrant, a certain something that will give him 'nothingness' to play with.

We have played with toys of happiness, sadness, knowledge. We have played with the idea of freedom, with God; with himself; his self and has lost himself.

Stage 9 is a restless search for nothingness. HE now knows that he really has no purpose on the earth. He has given up hope- and is now free in a weird sort of way- to obey his primary urges and exert maximum control over his environment to fulfill them. HE realizes that he does not have much time- while he exits, he must have all the unending temporary pleasures that he can to subdue his restless search.

Stage 10 is a reprisal of the search -of the curiosity. HE wants desperately to know what is inside the Gift but cannot. HE wants his life to be more meaningful to himself- although succeeding in a way to make it more meaningful for others. By this time, he realizes that he is more important in 'relation' to something apart from himself rather than all by himself.

His life is hopelessly intertwined with other individuals in a different or similar stage as himself- and he yearns to find a meaning for himself.

Stage 11:

The Soul {Miln. 71}

The king asked: "Venerable Nagasena, is the soul to be found?"

The elder replied: "According to ultimate reality, your majesty, the soul is not to be found."

"You are clever, venerable Nagasena."

Stage 12:

We invented language to make the random world less meaningful - to justify the randomness in things...

Stage 13: